Happiness and ...

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I am an addict,
An addict to what?
To a number of addictions.

I need to see a psychologist,
Yet I dont have the money,
So I take an alternative,
By adhering to steps told by the net.

Massive readings are done,
Hours are taken to digest,
And days are devoted in applying,
But the above fail to push away the addictions.

Like a drug-addict,
Hanging around with the addicts,
Socialising with the addicts,
And thinking about the addictions,
Worsen my addictions.

Lying on the bed,
Having nothing but wild thoughts,
Accompanied by evil inner voices,
Bewilder my emotion.

The net is disappointing,
'Find someone', they suggest.

Out of a massive public,
An angel detected,
Wearing a human mask,
But having a magic stick under his rob,
That with an 'Alacadabra',
Heals every addiction.

Yet angel is an everyone saviour,
He goes around waving his stick,
That sometimes those who are aided,
Adore him too much,
Flooded him with unnecassary compliments.

Angel cant be contacted by phone,
So behind the bars I wait,
For the angel,
To recite another 'Alacadabra'.

Lying on my bed,
While waiting for my endless turn,
A voice whispers: 'Another addiction?'

Done with the net,
Enough with the angel,
But the addictions,
Instead of getting better,
Is getting worst.

Like a drug-addict,
I want to make changes,
I pray for betterment,
I take alternatives,
I pay the risks,
But like a drug addict,
The efforts go to waste.

The net isnt working,
The angel wont keep coming,
All that is left is me,
To rethink on my addictions.

Should I get back to my addictions,
And keep being the person I used to be?
Or should I get rid of my addictions,
And be a brand new person?

Though I am an addict,
Though getting rid of addictions is hard,
Though I have to pass by Hell,
Though being slapped by reality hurts,
I refuse to be the person I used to be,
For the person,
Once allowed me,
To get addicted to vicious addictions.

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