Public Speaking
Today, my school had a public speaking competition. Sitting on the audience chair brought me to reminisce days when I wasn't the audience but one of the participants.
Everything began when I was in standard 2. It started with story-telling competitions. Mom is my biggest fan. She sews my costumes for every contest which I am in. When I was 8, I used to have a crow costume when I was telling stories on a crow and a witch's broom when I was telling stories on witches. All thanks go to my Omie.
Then I get older and story-telling isn't made for me anymore. So I involved in public speaking competitions. My journey as a participant wasn't easy. At the age of 10, I began writing my scripts. When I was 10, Google didnt do a good job alike today so I spent damn lot of time reading and mapping points. I used to envy my friends who are daughters of teachers because they always got their parents to do their scripts. I had to crack my head, worked extremely hard but the winner was a participant who had everything prepared by their parents. When I was a kid, that's a big issue.
Then I turned 13. I participated in more public speaking competitions. I was very into Syarahan Agama and managed to win dozen of awards. That was the time when I studied quran and hadith thoroughly. Again, I had no one to help me but myself. Im lucky to have a supportive mom because realising my growing interest in Syarahan Agama, she bought a set of hadith to be my reference.
16/7 was my downfall. I enrolled in a good school where I met tons of excellent students. I was totally nothing compared to them. I tried to get involved in the school debate club but was rejected by the club maybe because of my wonderful English. HAHA. That was the incident which led me to stop taking part in public speaking competitions. When I was a teenage girl, I never knew how to deal with rejection. To be precise, I hate rejection.
Then a new era began. I was neither the participant nor the audience instead, I was the absentee.
When I was in IPDA, things get worst. I lost my confidence to use English. My friends scared me because they spoke good English but I spoke cincai English. So again, I became one of the oblivious students in the class. I made up my mind to stop participating in any activities that requires me to speak. More, I did not need to participate in anything which requires me to use English because no one wanted me to be in. HAHA.
However, things change when I went abroad. I met Susan Gibbs a lecturer who gave me the opportunity to present my ideas in conferences (the extreme form of public speaking. Haha). She encourages me to keep sharing ideas. Then, I start having foreigners as my audience. I made mistakes but they never laugh at my poor English. Consequently, my English improves and the best is, I regain my courage to use English.
Today, I saw students who felt frustrated because they didnt do well. Frustrated because they were rejected. Frustrated because they had friends who did wayyy much better than them. And frustrated because no one values their sleepless nights effort.
Some of them may lose their faith in using English and some may result to do things that I did. Worst will happen if they fail to meet people like Susan. Now I wonder, what might happen to me and where might I stand today if I dont meet Susan.
Readers and sisters,
I am not the best person to give advices. However, I wanna share on what I've learnt.
Looking back at my past, I admit that I am the girl who was rejected by my school debate club, the girl who was laughed because of her bad English, the girl who was ignored by lecturers because she didnt perform in her assignments and the girl who was teased because she had a lil bit of Trg accent in her English.
And I am also the girl who stands before a large and educated crowd sharing my ideas and my research. I am not boasting but I want my readers to note that people can reject, laugh, ignore and tease you as hard as they wish. You dont need to waste your time either to weep or to treat them the same. All you need is just a self-talk saying 'hey bitch, watch me shine'.
Everything began when I was in standard 2. It started with story-telling competitions. Mom is my biggest fan. She sews my costumes for every contest which I am in. When I was 8, I used to have a crow costume when I was telling stories on a crow and a witch's broom when I was telling stories on witches. All thanks go to my Omie.
Then I get older and story-telling isn't made for me anymore. So I involved in public speaking competitions. My journey as a participant wasn't easy. At the age of 10, I began writing my scripts. When I was 10, Google didnt do a good job alike today so I spent damn lot of time reading and mapping points. I used to envy my friends who are daughters of teachers because they always got their parents to do their scripts. I had to crack my head, worked extremely hard but the winner was a participant who had everything prepared by their parents. When I was a kid, that's a big issue.
Then I turned 13. I participated in more public speaking competitions. I was very into Syarahan Agama and managed to win dozen of awards. That was the time when I studied quran and hadith thoroughly. Again, I had no one to help me but myself. Im lucky to have a supportive mom because realising my growing interest in Syarahan Agama, she bought a set of hadith to be my reference.
16/7 was my downfall. I enrolled in a good school where I met tons of excellent students. I was totally nothing compared to them. I tried to get involved in the school debate club but was rejected by the club maybe because of my wonderful English. HAHA. That was the incident which led me to stop taking part in public speaking competitions. When I was a teenage girl, I never knew how to deal with rejection. To be precise, I hate rejection.
Then a new era began. I was neither the participant nor the audience instead, I was the absentee.
When I was in IPDA, things get worst. I lost my confidence to use English. My friends scared me because they spoke good English but I spoke cincai English. So again, I became one of the oblivious students in the class. I made up my mind to stop participating in any activities that requires me to speak. More, I did not need to participate in anything which requires me to use English because no one wanted me to be in. HAHA.
However, things change when I went abroad. I met Susan Gibbs a lecturer who gave me the opportunity to present my ideas in conferences (the extreme form of public speaking. Haha). She encourages me to keep sharing ideas. Then, I start having foreigners as my audience. I made mistakes but they never laugh at my poor English. Consequently, my English improves and the best is, I regain my courage to use English.
Today, I saw students who felt frustrated because they didnt do well. Frustrated because they were rejected. Frustrated because they had friends who did wayyy much better than them. And frustrated because no one values their sleepless nights effort.
Some of them may lose their faith in using English and some may result to do things that I did. Worst will happen if they fail to meet people like Susan. Now I wonder, what might happen to me and where might I stand today if I dont meet Susan.
Readers and sisters,
I am not the best person to give advices. However, I wanna share on what I've learnt.
Looking back at my past, I admit that I am the girl who was rejected by my school debate club, the girl who was laughed because of her bad English, the girl who was ignored by lecturers because she didnt perform in her assignments and the girl who was teased because she had a lil bit of Trg accent in her English.
And I am also the girl who stands before a large and educated crowd sharing my ideas and my research. I am not boasting but I want my readers to note that people can reject, laugh, ignore and tease you as hard as they wish. You dont need to waste your time either to weep or to treat them the same. All you need is just a self-talk saying 'hey bitch, watch me shine'.
Hurm. How well are the people who used to reject, laugh, ignore and tease me doing now?
